Words by Spooks McGhie.
O.K. How you doing? Spooks McGhie here again with a question that’s been on my mental for quite some time… Since when has it become socially acceptable to talk about stealing a person’s woman on a public domain? I mean… people used to DIE for that kind of talk. Like a duel would ensue and one of those people CEASED TO BE afterwards, like, their life ended! But for some reason almost every song I listen to has a line about taking someones girl and doing things to her that one would consider inappropriate.
Now I’m not the type of guy stuck on those types of labels or even the concept of human possession by some type of verbal contract (“YOU’RE MINES!”) But there’s a certain level of disrespect that, as a man, I just can’t bring myself to. Am I being a softy? Has fatherhood turned me into a mushy ball of mushiness?
Or am I right to be morally conflicted about deceptively seeking affection from a woman that I KNOW is, in your mind, exclusively “yours.”
This perpetuation of infidelity and debauchery in Hip-Hop music has brought me to ask this question. Has “mainstream” Hip-Hop lost touch with what is considered “right” or “wrong”? What other morally unjust acts are recurring themes in this genre? And have we become desensitized to the things that were at one time considered taboo?
Now don’t get me wrong… I’m not trying to say that I am some moral judge standing behind my keyboard saying what is right or wrong.
I’ve done my dirt and believe it or not I’ve stolen a few girlfriends in my day, but we all have to grow up. There are certain things that just ain’t right regardless of what your beliefs are. Am I wrong? Is there absolutely nothing new about this idea of singing about stealing people’s girl?
Upon further investigation, I have realized that the “steal your girl” lyric goes as far back as 1988’s Audio Two hit “Top Billin” in which the emcee states, “I stole your girl while you were in prison.”
(Ouch. Cold blooded.) In fact, go back to the beginnings of recorded Hip-Hop and you will see even the beloved Sugarhill Gang dabbled in questionable relationship advice and moral ills “if your girl starts acting up… then you take her friend.” The only difference between then and now is that these types of references to misogyny were occasional. The artists of that time were well rounded and represented the street life while they sprinkled a bit of knowledge here and there. My question is why are these types of lyrics in virtually every popular Hip-Hop Record? Why is this idea being put out there so frequently?
I have a few theories, but unfortunately I can’t share them with you because you will think I’m a wacky conspiracy theorist.
I will say that complaining about these types of lyrics with a “back in my day” type of attitude would not only be irrational and judgmental (I mean I grew up during the Nelly ‘Tip Drill’ and Hot Boyz having women ‘Drop it like it’s hot’) it also makes me sound like an old fart.
I’m very much about progression and evolution of the mind which is why I welcome artists showing their deep feelings on records. I promise, I’m not obsessed with the “Golden Era” of Hip-Hop music and I don’t wish things “back the way they were” because technically, things weren’t really that different, they just wore different clothes and spoke different slang.BUT I do feel that we can learn from a lot of the curators of this. Their ideals…their need for preservation of culture.. self respect.. self worth. I want that stuff. We NEED that stuff.
I just want to know was this article pointless or did it spark a conversation? Comment below with some of your favorite “I stole your girl” or “I got your girl…” lyrics. I’ll get my aluminum foil hat while we can hash out my theories. In the meantime respect the ladies bruh. Yo momma is a lady!
The Inconsistent Feminist, Spooks McGhie